


Once Upon a Pop Song

by oywiththepeetaalready



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-11
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2018-03-01 00:31:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 14,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2752841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oywiththepeetaalready/pseuds/oywiththepeetaalready
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some authors are inspired by movies, others by books, still others by real life. Others hear songs and imagine stories written on lyrics. Series of Everlark drabbles/oneshots inspired by Taylor Swift's "1989." **Need not enjoy Swift's music for stories. They merely serve as inspiration.**</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome to New York

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sponsormusings](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sponsormusings/gifts).



> This project started after a discussion with sponsormusings (who probably could have done a much better job at this than me) but we realized just how much inspiration can come for fics from the lyrics from 1989. And then, this happened.
> 
> Each drabble is inspired by the corresponding track on the album and are unrelated to other chapters. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing. Nothing involving Taylor Swift except some CDs and nothing involving Hunger Games except some books.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Katniss when moves into a new apartment in a new city, she finds a familiar face.

“Ouch, shit!” Katniss says, stubbing her toe within seconds of entering her new apartment.

 _Who the hell leaves an end table sitting in the middle of an entryway? Dumbass movers._ She hears a voice from the hallway as she continues to mutter curses to herself.

“You okay?”

She spins around, almost losing her balance and falling onto the aforementioned end table, to see the source of the sound.

“No fucking way,” she murmurs. “Peeta Mellark.”

Peeta’s facial expression indicates that he is thinking something along the same lines.

“Katniss?”

“The one and only. I think.”

Peeta laughs, the faintly familiar sound warming Katniss from the inside. “I definitely haven’t met another. Moving in or out?”

“In. Maybe. If I can actually find my way through the place without dying. The end table already tried to jump me.”

“Katniss Everdeen, moving into my building. And far away from Panem High. What are the odds?”

Katniss blushes. “It’s actually not Everdeen anymore.”

Peeta’s eyes dart down to her left ring finger. “Oh really?”

“Katniss Hawthorne actually. I never changed back to my maiden name after I got divorced.”

“Wow. Never thought you would be the one to be divorced at twenty-five.” Peeta grimaces. “God that was insensitive. Sorry. I just meant-“

Katniss laughs and waves her hand. “It’s fine. Honest. No apologies needed. I didn’t exactly get around in high school. I don’t blame you for being surprised. I am too.”

She looks at the man in front of her and shakes her head, looking him up and down subtly. He hasn’t changed much since high school, with only muscle definition and laugh lines around his eyes hinting at the fact that he isn’t a teenager anymore.

“Oh, sorry, I’m bad at this. Want to actually come inside? I mean, if you can find a place to stand, sit or perch.” She gestures helplessly at the mess inside, suddenly overwhelmed at the prospect of organizing.

“Yeah, thanks,” Peeta says, walking into the room. “Hey, I know it looks like you’ve barely moved in, but do you want help setting some stuff up?”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah why not?”

“You’d help a stranger out without wanting anything in return?”

“Since when are you a stranger?” Peeta asks.

Katniss rolls her eyes. “I’m not exactly the same girl you knew ten years ago.”

“Good. I liked her, but the feeling wasn’t always mutual. Kinda ruined high school for me.”

“You were homecoming king, salutatorian and Most Friendly in the superlatives. That little thing we had at the beginning of high school should hardly make your list of accomplishments.”

Peeta moves closer to Katniss. “You said yourself that you aren’t the same person as you were in high school. Is it so hard to believe that I’ve changed? That maybe our…tryst meant more to me than you may realize?”

“Tryst?” Katniss barks out a laugh. “Are we in a romance novel?”

“No,” Peeta admits with a smirk. “But that was one hell of a night.”

She blushes. “I can honestly say I didn’t expect someone here to be able to remind me of high school, let alone my personal life in high school. I figured this was a way to start over.”

“Who says you can’t?”

Katniss rolls her eyes. “The guy I lost my virginity to apparently lives down the hall from me. That isn’t exactly starting over.”

“Depends on how you handle it. Katniss, other than one summer, how much time did we actually spend with one another? How much can you honestly say you know about me?”

“I remember quite a bit.”

Peeta tuts at her. “No, no, Katniss. You’re in a big city now. You don’t have to remember things. I think it’s safe to say most of what we remember is either no longer true or not so important that it should hinder you letting me help you set up this death trap of an apartment.”

Katniss smiles. “So you aren’t the homecoming king?”

“I’m a semi-starving artist who bakes for the coffee shops and cafés around town in exchange for really crappy money and the opportunity to hang my artwork in their restaurants. I left town to escape an abusive mother and a past of being the golden boy. So you tell me, Katniss Everdeen. Am I the same boy you knew?”

She shakes her head. “I didn’t realize I wasn’t the only one running. You sure you want to get to know a girl who got divorced before thirty?”

“Absolutely. Because that girl is nothing like the Katniss Everdeen I knew. I’m intrigued. I want to know this woman who just moved in. I don’t want to necessarily reminisce about the past.”

“Really? You don’t want to revisit anything about our past?” Katniss asks with a gleam in her eye.

“Never said that,” he replies without missing a beat. “But for now…” He trails off as he walks over to her, holding out his hand to shake. “Peeta Mellark. 3C. Need help setting up?”

“Katniss Hawthorne,” she says, smiling softly. “And yeah, I could use a hand getting on my feet. I’m new to town and hoping for a fresh start.”

He starts walking backwards out of the apartment. “I’m free Saturday and happy to help. I’ve recently done the same.”

“Looking forward to it, Peeta Mellark.”

\---

_When we first dropped our bags on apartment floors, took our broken hearts, put them in a drawer. Everybody here was someone else before. And you can want who you want, boys and boys and girls and girls. Welcome to New York; it’s been waiting for you._


	2. Blank Space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Don't believe everything you hear...unless you want to see the truth for yourself.

When Peeta first sees her, it is about a month after he had heard her name whispered in the locker room in the gym he belongs to.

Katniss Everdeen.

Based on everything he’s heard, she’s a force to be reckoned with. Whether that’s good or bad, however, he’s not sure. He’s heard enough locker room talk to know that she’s the cause for many a bruised ego.

But honestly, it’s not like dumbasses like Cato and Marvel don’t deserve it. They think the sun rises and falls solely due to their existence on this planet, so being knocked down a few pegs probably wasn’t the worst thing that could have happened to them.

And when he sees her for the first time, he isn’t shocked they both tried and failed. He’s at a dinner party celebrating his friend Delly’s engagement to her long-time boyfriend Thresh, who apparently knows the famed Katniss. He almost chokes on his scotch and soda when he catches of a glimpse of the woman he hears so much about.

She’s stunning.

Long, dark hair in a thick mane of waves down her back, smoky grey eyes taking in the room and a black dress and heels that make him do a double take.

It isn't hard to see how she has broken so many hearts. His may have broke just looking at her. She hardly has on any makeup, her hairstyle and clothes are clearly from work earlier that day and yet she effortlessly outshines the bride-to-be.

He takes another sip of his drink to disguise the fact that he cannot take his eyes off this woman he feels he knows so much about, without ever speaking to her.

He spends the next few minutes terrifyingly aware of her presence as they both mingle and move through the crowd. After congratulating Delly and Thresh for a final time, Peeta goes to collect his coat and leave, anxious to get to bed so as to not be exhausted for his early morning shift at his bakery the next day.

However, as he makes it to the door, he finds her in his way. And his desire to sleep is completely lost.

"Katniss?"

She raises one eyebrow and eyes him in interest. "You know me?" Peeta feels his face flush slightly at just why he's aware of her and she nods in understanding. "Ah, so you have heard of me then. We haven't met."

"I suppose you could say that."

"And who would we possibly have in common?"

Peeta smirks. "Cato and Marvel. We go to the same gym."

"Oh. Them," Katniss replies, rolling her eyes.

"That is the usual response to those two."

"So, dare I ask what your opinion of me is?"

Peeta decides to take a chance. "I can tell you over drinks - if you're ready to leave this party, that is."

"Must not have been too bad then," Katniss says, smiling softly.

"Oh, I never said that. But bad or good, I'd be a fool to not even try to get to know you."

She raises a hand in front of her. "Lead the way."

\---

After she follows him to a nearby bar and they are seated and served, Peeta turns to Katniss. "Do you make a habit out of going out with guys whose name you don't know?"

"Who says I don't know who you are?" she replies, taking a sip of her newly delivered drink.

Peeta crosses his arms and leans back in his chair. "I'm listening."

"Peeta Mellark. Owner of Mellark Bakeries. Charming as hell, able to woo just about any woman he wishes, serial monogamist and apparently phenomenal in bed." At Peeta's shocked stare, she laughs. "Girls talk too, sweetheart."

"Well. Didn't see that coming."

"I'm curious to know what you've heard about me."

"I've heard enough to know that either you are the perfect woman for me or this will go up in flames faster than you could strike a match."

Katniss leans forward on the table. "You're not wrong."

"Care to test it out? Maybe one of us can tame the other. Maybe I won't even end up on your list of defeats."

"I think I can work you in," Katniss says with a grin.

Peeta leans in and kisses her. "I had hoped you would say that."

_\---_

_Ain't it funny rumors fly, and I know you heard about me. So hey, let's be friends. I'm dying to see how this one ends. Grab your passport and my hand. I could make the bad guys good for a weekend._

_So it's gonna be forever or it's gonna go down in flames. You can tell me when it's over if the high was worth the pain. Got a long list of ex-lovers; they'll tell you I'm insane, cause you know I love the players and you love the game._

_Cause we're young and we're reckless; we'll take this way too far. It'll leave you breathless or with a nasty scar. Got a long list of ex-lovers; they'll tell you I'm insane. But I got a blank space baby…and I'll write your name._

_But you'll come back each time you leave, cause darling I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream..._


	3. Style

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Sometimes you can't even quit the things you know are bad for you.

_I’m here. Come out._

The message on her phone lights up the room and Katniss shoots a glance at it before running to the door, silently thanking whatever deity that may be listening that she has a quiet tread. She looks back over her shoulder to make sure her roommate isn’t leaving her bedroom and heads outside. A navy blue Mustang, lights off and the engine barely a purr, idles at the sidewalk outside her apartment building and she smiles despite herself as she heads towards it.

“Well this is very kidnap-ish of you,” she says, sliding into the car. The man in the other seat turns to her with a grin.

“Only the best for you, dear.”

Katniss rolls her eyes. “Yeah, no contact for three weeks and a four word text message. Man, do you know what a girl wants.”

“You still came.”

“I’m a sucker for punishment, clearly.” He opens his mouth to say something but she shakes her head and cuts him off. “Just drive, Peeta.”

He nods and starts up the car, heading towards the outskirts of town. Katniss leans back in the seat and lets out a breath. No matter how long it’s been or how they had parted the last time they saw one another, she came to him when he called. He was right. She always did. Her gaze moves from the windshield to the side window, watching as the woods fly by, so quickly that she can barely focus on it. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Peeta’s eyes flicker back and forth from the road to her.

“I find it hard to believe that three weeks makes me look any different than the last time you saw me.”

He startles slightly, not expecting her voice after the twenty minutes of silence during the drive. “It’s been a long three weeks.” Peeta’s hand moves to where hers rests near the center console. She allows him to hold it for a moment before she pulls it free to cross her arms over her stomach.

“I’ve heard you kept yourself busy. I doubt you realized the length of time.”

“Katniss…”

“I told you, Peeta. Just drive.”

He nods, his expression a combination of annoyance and guilt. His hands tighten on the steering wheel and the rest of the drive is spent in silence. As he pulls into an overlook site on the side of the road, Katniss has to stop herself from referring to it as ‘their spot.’ For the past three years, the two have found their way to this exact parking spot in this exact overlook whenever they need to be alone, whether it be to fight or make up.

As per tradition, they get out of the car and move to sit on the hood, looking out over the mountains around them. This time, after they are seated, Peeta takes a flask out of the pocket of his leather jacket and offers it to Katniss. She accepts and, after taking a swallow, turns towards him.

“So what is her name?”

Peeta looks down at his hands. “Clove. I met her at the bar last month.” When Katniss doesn’t respond, he catches her eye. “Katniss, seriously-“

“You don’t owe me an explanation.”

“No, but I do. I swear I don’t know what I’m doing. None of these girls are ever as amazing as you are. Why does this not work for us?”

Katniss takes another drink. “I don’t know. I met a guy a while back. Tried really hard to be into the idea of dating him and all I could do was compare him to you. Eventually gave up.”

His whole body turns towards her. “I wish you’d give this another chance then.”

“We want different things, Peeta. I’ve told you this.”

“But we work!” His hands gesture wildly as he talks. “This is stupid. We do whatever it is you call us, we fight, we separate, we find our way back. Don’t you think it’s worth trying again? It’s been two years.”

Her head falls back against the windshield of the car as she lets out an exhausted groan. “How many times do we have to have this conversation?”

“Until you realize I’m right,” he says. He pulls her to a sitting position again and holds on to her arms, forcing her to look at him. “Please. Try.” He leans in and kisses her. Without meaning to, her body responds, and Katniss feels her arms moving against her will to pull him against her. She moves back just enough to speak and prepares herself.

“Take me home, Peeta.”

His face falls, and she shakes her head. “You can stay tonight and we’ll talk more in the morning.”

“What if Madge sees me? I thought no one could see us together.”

She shrugs. “Then she sees.”

He grins and jumps off the car. “You mean it?”

Katniss nods, laughing as he picks her up and swings her into a hug. “Just take me home.”

\---

_Midnight, you come and pick me up, no headlights. Long drive, could end in burning flames or paradise. Fade into view, it’s been a while since I have even heard from you. I should tell you to leave cause I know exactly where it leads but I watch us go round and round each time._

_So it goes, he can’t keep his wild eyes on the road. Takes me home; lights are off, he’s taking off his coat. I say, I heard that you been out and about with some other girl. He says, what you’ve heard is true but I can’t stop thinking about you and I, I’ve been there too a few times._

_Just take me home._


	4. Out of the Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Distance can make the heart grow fonder...or it can break you apart.

Katniss sits on the floor of her on-campus apartment, staring up as her boyfriend paces back and forth, murmuring terms for his history final the next day.

“If I get charged for wearing a hole in the floor, I’m sending you the bill,” she says, laughing as he startles out of his reverie to blink at her. “Come back to earth, Peeta. You need a break.”

He shakes his head but slumps to the floor next to her. She pulls on his shoulder to get him to reposition so his head is in her lap. She starts to run her fingers through his hair and sings softly under her breath.

“Thank you,” he says, sighing.

“This is your last final. Just remember. You’ve done everything else. This is all you have left. Then you’re done.”

Peeta laughs at that sentence. “Oh no, I’m just done for the summer. Then it’s grad school time.” He sits up and turns to face her. “I still don’t think it’s fair-“

“That you have to have graduate experience to be a professor? I think you forget that I could all but recite that speech to you." 

He grins sheepishly. “Sorry, babe.”

“Don’t let it happen again,” she jokes, leaning in to kiss him quickly. He pulls her closer, refusing to let her get away. “Peeta, I love you and I want you to stop stressing but I’m pretty sure you still need to study.”

“I’ll study you. I’ll need lots of memories while I’m in school next semester and you’re off saving wildlife.” Peeta’s tone is teasing, but he sees his girlfriend’s face fall at his words. “Katniss, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring it up.”

Katniss tries to quell the tears she feels forming in her eyes. “Are you sure we aren’t just kidding ourselves? Long distance is for freshmen in college who don’t know how to break up with the people they gave their virginities to.” 

“Katniss…” Peeta’s voice becomes eerily calm. “We can do it.”

“What happens when we can’t see each other for months? What happens when you meet some crazy smart girl studying a similar historical period and you realize that she’s more of your type?”

“How many times have I told you? You are my type.”

Katniss shakes her head. Suddenly, the stress and the nerves seem to clear and she takes a deep breath. “You need to focus on school. You’re going to be six hours away from here. You can’t have me holding you back.”

“How the hell is being in love with you going to hold me back?”

“I know you. You’ll try too hard to make sure I don’t get left behind. You don’t know how to not be perfect at everything. The last thing I need to do is let your dream job get derailed because you’re spending every minute reassuring me that you love me.”

Peeta laughed humorlessly. “Are you seriously breaking up with me to give me my best chance? You have got to stop watching _Once Upon a Time_. This is too Snow White and Charming for my liking.”

“Peeta, look at me,” she says, the serious tone of her voice catching his attention. “I love you. That isn’t going to change. This isn’t because I think you’ll find someone better suited for you. This isn’t so I can date someone here and avoid long distance. This is so you won’t resent me later. Your master’s program is only a year. So take the year. Be away from me, from us. If you still want it when you come back, I’ll be here.”

His gaze is hard but she sees him slump as if he is giving in. “A year?”

“No more, no less. I’ll still be here. I can promise you that.”

“Are you allowing us to have contact?”

“Of course, Peeta. You’re my best friend. I want to hear about you creating new theories and blowing holes in how we look at the past.”

Her words force a small smile to his lips. He gets up and starts to put his stuff together. “Okay, fine. But did you have to do this in the middle of finals?” Peeta’s joke falls flat when Katniss catches a glimpse of his face and sees tear tracks running down his cheeks. She jumps to her feet and wraps her arms around his shoulders, trying to hide her own tears. He hugs her and then pulls back to kiss her. “A year.”

“Just a year.”

He nods and walks out, softly whispering an “I love you” that Katniss returns as he closes the door. “It’s for the best,” she mutters to herself.

_Almost exactly one year later_

A knock sounds at her apartment door and Katniss rushes to answer it, almost tripping in the process. When she opens it and sees Peeta on the other side, she immediately jumps up, all but wrapping herself around him. “I take it you’re happy to see me?” he says, laughing.

“It’s been a long year,” she replies, burying her face in his chest.

“And it’s over. Unless you’ve changed your mind and then I can just leave-” His words are cut off by her lips on his. “I’ll take that as a no?”

She shakes her head happily, pulling him into her apartment. “You’re not going anywhere.” 

\---

_Looking at it now, last December, we were built to fall apart, then fall back together. Your necklace hanging from my neck, the night we couldn’t quite forget, when we decided to move the furniture so we could dance, baby, like we stood a chance, two paper airplanes flying._

_When you started cryin’, baby I did, too. But when the sun came up, I was lookin’ at you. Remember when we couldn’t take the heat? I walked out and said, “I’m settin’ you free.” But the monsters turned out to be just trees and when the sun came up, you were lookin’ at me._


	5. All You Had to Do Was Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: One mistake is all it takes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning - this one is not HEA Everlark. But not all songs are. The next one will be though.

He stares at the girl in front of him in disbelief. “Katniss, what the hell-?”

“Peeta, I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have come but I had to. I had to try. Can I come in?”

The blond rubs sleep from his eyes and blearily blinks a few times before sighing and nodding. “Yeah. I guess.” When she moves past him through the open door, he catches a whiff of alcohol on her breath. “Are you drunk?”

“Not even a little bit. Just needed a bit of liquid courage.”

He closes the door and they move to his couch. Peeta positions himself as far on the other end of the seat from her as he possibly can before clearing his throat. “So why are you here?”

“I needed to see you; I told you that.” She looks down at her hands in her lap, picking at her fingernails nervously.

“And why is that? Last time I checked, you were the one who left.”

The sentence makes Katniss’ eyes jump to his. “I wish you would accept my apology.”

“Pleading text messages aren’t exactly heartfelt to me.”

“That’s why I’m here!” she says, voice raised and quavering slightly. “Peeta, please.”

“You had me. I had a ring. I was going to propose to you next month. I had it all planned out. But you are so damn scared of commitment…” He shakes his head sadly.

“Look at what I had for an example. My mother lost it completely when my father left her. My baby sister got her heart broken just two months ago by a man she had loved for seven years. I watched a part of your father die when you finally confessed everything your mother had done to you and he realized what had been going on under his nose.”

“My father!”

“Peeta,” she interrupts, trying to calm him. “In no way am I blaming him. Your father is one of the greatest men I’ve ever met. He helped make you into the incredible boy I fell in love with and the amazing man I enjoyed spending time with.”

Peeta nods brusquely. “Thank you. But your words don’t mean jack when I saw how you acted not even a week ago. I mentioned commitment and you had a flip out, told me you couldn’t handle it and left. How am I supposed to accept that that same girl wants me back now and has changed her mind on everything she complained about before?”

“You have to trust me,” she says. “Please trust me. I can’t promise I won’t panic again but I can promise not to leave.”

“You should never have to make that promise to someone you love. Do you know how much it hurt to see you run out the door and not return? To wait by the phone, to face my friends - our friends - and explain that you had left me?”

“I don’t know how else to say I’m sorry.”

Peeta shakes his head. “You’ve done this before, Katniss. Never to this extreme, but you’ve always scared easily. And I knew that. And respected it. I always tried to move at your pace. I knew at nineteen that I wanted to marry you but I waited until we were twenty-four to even mention it. I’ve waited so long for you to realize how wonderful we’ve had it. You didn’t until you no longer had me.”

The fact that Peeta’s always been good with his words doesn’t falter now and makes his feelings even more clear. His articulate phrasing and calm rationale made the situation even harder to deal with. An angry, sputtering Peeta would have been much preferred. This Peeta, the Peeta she’d always known made the conversation infinitely worse.

The tears begin to roll down her cheeks. “Peeta, please believe that I’m sorry.”

“I do believe it,” he says, finally reaching out to hold her hand. “But please believe that I’m not sure I can take any more of this. I love you. I love you so much. I’d be lying if I said I could imagine my world without you. But I’m tired. I’m so tired of wondering if I’m going to scare you away. I’ve tried so hard, and it is never good enough. And all I wanted from you was to stay.”

“Please…” she trails off, not sure what to say.

“What changed your mind?” he asks, the sudden change of conversation topic startling Katniss.

“That night, I had a suspicion I never should have left. But the very next day, when I went to work, something happened and I immediately wanted to text you. It was just some random thing at work, nothing important, but I didn’t want to share with anyone else. You’re a part of me.”

Peeta nods. “I need time.”

“Okay!” Katniss agrees with more enthusiasm than she had intended, all but elated that he is no longer rejecting her outright. He almost quirks a smile at her response but gets up. She nods and follows him to the door, going through the moment it is open.

“I promise I’ll stay,” she says, watching his eyes brighten momentarily. “However long it takes.”

**\---**

_Stay, hey, all you had to do was stay. Had me in the palm of your hand. Why’d you have to go and lock me out when I let you in? Stay, hey, now you say you want it back, now that it’s just too late. Well, could’ve been easy. All you had to do was stay._

_Here you are now, calling me up, but I don’t know what to say. I’ve been picking up the pieces of the mess you made. People like you always want back the love they pushed aside, but people like me are gone forever when you say goodbye._

_Let me remind you, this was what you wanted. You ended it. You were all I wanted, but not like this._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay on this! I started a new job today and had a lot to do yesterday to prep and I hadn't quite finished this. I can't promise that tomorrow's will be done because I'm going straight from work to a freelance gig and don't know when I'll be home (and I'm having some health issues and just want to sleep). I can promise that it will never take more than every other day for me to post a new drabble till I'm through the album.


	6. Shake it Off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Happiness is the best revenge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for the day delay. Work and sickness is not a good combo. Here's some semi-fluff to make up for the last somewhat angsty drabble. Enjoy!

Katniss looks around the party, seeing her ex, Darius, lean in and kiss a girl on the cheek. She spares a glare for the couple, rolling her eyes and trying to ignore the fact that his new girlfriend is everything she isn’t: blonde, perky and giggly. _And full of cleavage._ Katniss glances down at herself, remembering how pleased she had felt at how the push-up bra she was wearing had made her look when she had been getting ready earlier in the evening.

Now, all she could think about was the fact that it took her ex-boyfriend all of a week to get over her and move on to Tall, Blonde and Leggy. She takes a sip from the cup in her hand and rolls her eyes. _To hell with it. To hell with him. I’m worth more anyways_. Katniss lets her gaze roam around the crowded living room and finds her eyes attracted to a blonde guy animatedly telling a story in the center of a small group of people.

The guy’s hands wave dramatically in the air, almost upsetting the cup of cheap beer in one of them, but he laughs and saves it just in time to apparently conclude his story and take a sip. Katniss takes a moment to really look at him while there is no attention on her and realizes that he is quite possibly the best looking guy at the party. _Definitely better than the ass who just dumped me._ His blue eyes and mop of curly hair made him look almost young and innocent, but his broad shoulders and obviously muscular upper body gives the appearance of a guy about to graduate college.

The group around him apparently moves on to a topic that he doesn’t have much input on and he continues sipping from his drink and gazing around the party. Katniss happens to catch his eye and he smiles before excusing himself and walking towards her. She feels her breath catch slightly at his approach but manages to come off cool and collected.

“Hey, I’m Peeta. I don’t think we’ve met,” he says, actually offering a hand for her to shake.

Katniss smiles and takes his hand. “Katniss. You’re probably right. Who do you know here?”

The blond - Peeta - looks over the crowd and points to a guy she recognizes vaguely from working out at the rec center. “Finnick is one of my best friends. This is his place.”

“Oh, then I must know his girlfriend. Annie. She invited me. We share a poetry class.”

Peeta nods and smiles. “So you clearly go to school here. What year are you?”

“Graduate in May.”

“Ah! Same here. Cheers to that,” he says and Katniss indulges him with a grin. They attempt to clink their Solo cups and laugh as they take a drink. Peeta’s eyes not-so-discreetly look her up and down as he almost-shyly asks, “Wanna dance?”

She nods emphatically and the two finish their drinks before tossing them and heading to the makeshift dance floor in the living room.

Peeta immediately places his hands on her hips as they start to dance and her arms wind around his neck. Somehow, even amongst the grinding couples throughout the living room, they manage to carry on brief conversation while they dance, but Katniss soon finds herself not caring about talking. She moves her body closer so her hips brush against his on every pass and feels rather than hears him let out a small groan.

The song switches to a more sultry hip hop sound and she turns in his arms, pressing her body fully against the length of his. Peeta catches on quickly, bringing his arms to cross lightly over her stomach and waist, helping to guide her movements against him. She feels his fingers trace the bare skin between her top and her jeans and rests her head back against his shoulder.

“Damn you’re good at this,” he mutters into her ear. Katniss can’t help but smirk and turns her head to see him face-to-face. His face is flushed, as she assumes her own is, from the heat of the people around them and his eyes are a darker shade of blue than they had been before.

“You aren’t half bad yourself,” she replies, smiling. His head moves closer to hers. “Can I kiss you, Katniss?”

Shocked at actually being asked and not just being groped, Katniss takes a second to answer, which Peeta seems to see as rejection. He opens his mouth, presumably to apologize, but she beats him to it and leans in to kiss him.

The angle is awkward at first, but he uses his hands to turn her to face him completely. Her hands go to his shoulders and he responds by tightening his hands on her hips. Katniss loses track of time as his lips move over hers, each second completely different than the last. When they finally break free, she leans her forehead against his and tries to catch her breath.

“And to think I almost didn’t come to this party because my ex is here,” she says.

He grins and kisses her again. “God, I’m glad you did.”

\---

_My ex man brought his new girlfriend, she's like ‘oh my god,’ but I'm just gonna shake. And to the fella over there with the hella good hair, won't you come on over baby we could shake, shake, shake..._

_Cause the players gonna play, play, play and the haters gonna hate, hate, hate. Baby I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake...shake it off._


	7. I Wish You Would

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Sometimes an end isn't always forever.

For the third time that night, Katniss sees headlights pass her bedroom window. For anyone else, this would be a normal occurrence, but since she lives on the end of a cul de sac, it is rare to have that many people need to turn around in the middle of the night.

She shakes her head, trying to clear her hopeful thoughts. A large part of her - larger than she cares to admit - wants to believe it is Peeta.

The two had broken up a month earlier due to a huge amount of outside stress on the relationship caused them to crash and burn. His father had retired, leaving him in charge of the family business at only twenty-six. Katniss had lost her job due to downsizing in her company and had been forced to relocate to a smaller home while she worked part time teaching various outdoors and fitness classes at the local rec center.

The stress had caused a knock-down, drag-out fight that Katniss can’t even remember the reason behind. The arguments were ridiculous, both shouting things that could have never been true. He had accused Katniss of seeking solace in her coworker Gale. She had thrown barbs at him for being married to his work and that he would never be free to wed her someday because of it.

Looking back, it was appalling.

And Katniss misses him like fucking crazy.

Whenever she sees a car pass her home, she can’t help but hope to see his Jeep parking in front of her mailbox like he always did. But she assumes he still isn’t pleased with her and knows he believes the same about her.

If that’s the case, he couldn’t be more wrong. There’s one thing Katniss Everdeen could never do, and that is hate Peeta Mellark.

They had complimented each other perfectly: just opposite enough to keep things interesting but with similar interests that always gave them things to do together and topics to talk about. They had fit together in ways Katniss had never imagined, and after three years of dating, she had been hoping that her life with Peeta was going to move forward.

Instead, it had gone so far backwards that it had dissolved into nothingness.

As she loses herself in her thoughts, she sees headlights for a fourth time.

_This is getting ridiculous._

She throws a sweatshirt on over her tank top and goes out to her porch, hoping to catch a glimpse of the vehicle constantly going past. She sees a familiar vehicle driving away and shakes her head to make sure her mind isn’t playing tricks on her.

Red Jeep? Check. Alumni bumper sticker? Check. Save the arts license plate? Check.

_Holy shit. It actually is Peeta._

She grabs her phone from the pocket of her pajama shorts and texts him before she can stop herself.

**Why are you in my neighborhood?**

Five minutes pass with no answer so Katniss shakes her head and goes back into the house feeling slightly defeated. It would have been too good to be true. She lays back on her bed and unpauses her Netflix, only for it to be immediately interrupted by a knock on her door.

Suspicious, she goes to unlock it and is shocked to have her hopes confirmed.

“Peeta!” She steps out onto the porch and closes the door behind her. “What are you doing here?”

The blonde man looks down at his shoes and shrugs awkwardly. “I was getting up the nerve to see if we could talk.”

“At two a.m.?”

Peeta finally meets her eyes. “Good a time as any. I’m sorry, Katniss.”

“For?” She can’t help but hope that his apology isn’t just for showing up unannounced.

“Our fight. I know it might be a be too little too late, but I really just don’t want to give this up.”

She feels her face flush with happiness. “You’re serious.” It is meant to be a question, but Katniss’ voice comes out more as an incredulous statement.

Peeta nods.

It’s all the invitation she needs. She throws her arms around his neck, surprising him and causing him to grasp her waist to not stumble backwards. She feels him relax and wrap his arms around her.

“I’m sorry, too. You have no idea how much.”

Peeta pulls away from her slightly, smiling. He leans in to kiss her on the forehead. “So I take it it’s okay I came over.”

Katniss stretches up to kiss him lightly, unable to keep a grin from her lips. “Always.”

\---

_I wish you would come back, wish I'd never hung up the phone like I did. I wish you knew that I'd never forget you as long as I'd live. And I wish you were right here, right now. It's all good. I wish you would._

_It's 2 A.M. in my room; headlights pass the window pane, I think of you. We were a crooked love in a straight line down. Makes you wanna run and hide but it makes you turn right back around..._

_I wish we could go back and remember what we were fighting for. Wish you knew that I miss you too much to be mad anymore._

__****  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed this one. This was actually the one of the first ones I wrote and loved doing it. This almost puts this at a halfway point, but I'll be honest. I haven't written the next one because I'm hitting a pretty big road block on 'Bad Blood.' Should be up tomorrow night before I go to bed though!


	8. Bad Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Peeta and Gale have some words...to put it lightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the slight delay. The next chapter will be up in like sixteen hours to make up for the lateness of this one. Writer's block hit me on ideas for a bit. Sorry!

Nobody who knows Peeta Mellark would ever assume he hates someone.

The man is known for being one of the kindest people in the state, all but famous for handing out free treats at the bakery to small children with their families and being one of the few people who cares when asking someone how they are. His eyes are almost always shining with warmth and even when he’s angry, it burns off quickly and never seems to leave a lasting mark.

Except for one.

Everybody who knows Peeta Mellark is fully aware that he’s in love with someone.

Luckily for him, it became mutual about three years prior. Happily engaged, he and Katniss Everdeen seem more and more in love with each passing day. They’ve mastered the art of relationships, being more like friends who happened to fall in love than any couple out of a Nicholas Sparks novel.

Nobody who knows the couple would ever guess that there is an underlying insecurity.

And its name is Gale Hawthorne.

Gale had been Peeta’s best friend. The two had grown up down the street from one another, played on the baseball team together throughout high school and college and were roommates their first two years in college. Gale’s darker countenance balanced out Peeta’s blonde sunniness in a way that made them the perfect pair. They had played wingmen for one another and it had gone flawlessly until one day, when Peeta introduced Gale to Katniss, his new girlfriend.

Peeta had met Katniss sophomore year in a chemistry course where they had been assigned to one another in lab partners. Immediately, he had fallen for the beautiful, brainy girl and had taken almost a year to do something about it, only to find, luckily, that she had felt the same the entire time. Not so fortunately, Gale had also found the girl irresistible.

After a rather serious spat, the two men had cooled off their friendship until it almost froze and snapped in half. Peeta has barely talked to his old friend in months, ever since his engagement to Katniss had been announced.

And for some reason, today, Gale Hawthorne has come into the bakery.

It takes Peeta a few minutes to realize that Gale is there as he finishes loading in the new pastries and loaves of bread for the afternoon rush that will pick up in a few hours. When he sees the taller man looking over at him, he startles slightly.

“Can I help you?” he asks, his businesslike facade still coming off as polite.

“Got a second?”

Peeta nods and crosses his arms across his chest.

After a moment of silence, Gale realizes that this is the most cooperation he is going to get from Peeta and clears his throat. “I really just came to apologize and say congratulations.”

“Thanks.”

“You don’t believe me, do you?”

Peeta barks out a laugh. “Why in the hell would I believe you? You asked me to step back. You told me that she would be perfect for you if I just gave her a chance. You told me you were better for Katniss, the girl I’m going to marry, than I ever could be. My own best friend saw me in love with a girl and asked me to move aside so you could take a shot at it. Forgive me if I find it hard to believe that you came here to send your well wishes for our lifelong happiness.”

“Don’t be obstinate,” Gale says, shaking his head. “It doesn’t suit you. It took me a while to get used to the idea of you marrying her-”

“How do you have to get used to the idea? You didn’t meet her first; you didn’t introduce us. I in no way took her from you. You do not get to be wounded by this. You never had a shot with her, Gale. And to this day, Katniss still doesn’t know about our conversation three and a half years ago. I didn’t want her to see you that way. Do you guys even talk anymore? She rarely mentions your name at home.”

Gale winces at the mention of Peeta and Katniss living together. “No, she doesn’t really contact me. I figured you had told her what happened.”

“It isn’t my place. I won’t stop your friendship with my fiancé, because I trust her and I’d like to think you wouldn’t be such a terrible guy as to make a move on an engaged woman.”

“But you don’t trust me? It’s been years, man. Can’t we move on from this? We were best friends for so many years.”

“Let’s just get things straight, Gale. The fact that we were best friends makes this all even worse. Forgiving is one thing, forgetting is another and to be honest, I’m not sure I can do either. I can’t look at you without thinking about the fact that you told me you were better than I am and that you deserved the woman I’m in love with more than I do. So do us both a favor, Gale, and just stay away from me. I don’t think this is a problem you can fix.”

The two men stare at one another for a long moment before Gale nods brusquely and walks away, leaving the man he once loved as a brother behind him.

\---

_Now we got problems and I don't think we can solve them. You made a really deep cut and baby now we got bad blood._

_Did you think we'd be fine? Still got scars on my back from your knife. So don't think it's in the past; these kind of wounds they last and they last. Now did you think it all through? All these things will catch up to you and time can heal but this won't. So if you’re coming my way, just don't._

_Band-aids don't fix bullet holes. You say sorry just for show. If you live like that, you live with ghosts. If you love like that, blood runs cold._

__


	9. Wildest Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Sometimes you take the chance, even when you may get burned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I'll be honest. This was the first drabble I wrote and it was my absolute favorite to write. It is kind of based off my summer but I seriously loved writing this drabble and I hope you like it.

She turns to glance at his profile and smiles softly. Her interest in Peeta Mellark had gone from an innocent crush to reciprocated attention within weeks of him breaking up with his girlfriend.

Suddenly, he was spending time at her apartment, inviting her to go to a local bar after work and texting her until the early morning hours. Then he had become her first call when she got a job and wanted to celebrate.

She had become who he texted when life was a bit too much and he needed to be calmed down or distracted. Then he was kissing her on his couch as they pretended to watch television. And she was spending nights at his house learning what was on his Netflix queue and what made him moan and sigh.

Something inside her had warned her not to get too involved. But she had forgotten something key.

Katniss Everdeen didn’t fall often, but when she did, she fell hard. Peeta Mellark had gotten her to fall. And it was two and a half months into dating him that she had realized he wasn’t going to catch her.

It’s just getting too good to stop now.

A voice nags at her to get out, to escape before the break up would hurt her even more than it already inevitably will. However, before this voice had even made itself known, Katniss had already decided she didn’t care. And now, as she traces his face with her gaze, she confirms that she still doesn’t.

She had wanted the guy, pursued the guy and gotten the guy. At this point, she doesn’t care that she’s more than likely just a rebound. She doesn’t care that this could very well take her down. The idea of a summer fling doesn’t sound too bad, even if it is already so much more than that to her.

She can all but see the end in sight, whenever he thinks out loud about how stressful his next semester is going to be, whenever he worries his lip between his teeth and murmurs about not knowing how he is going to fit everything in. Katniss knows the easiest solution is to drop the relationship. She’ll even probably be the one to bring the possibility up, grasp onto that last little strand of control.

But right now, she is content to hold his hand where it rests on the center console of his car and watch the sunset play off the blonde strands of his hair. Right now, they are driving to God-knows-where without telling anyone and enjoying every second of the adventure. She isn’t about to question a damn thing.

He says she calms him. She knows he sets her on fire. The odds of his calm dousing her flames are getting higher by the day. And yet, when he looks over and smiles at her, causing laugh lines around his eyes, she can’t bring herself to care. She just smiles back, runs her hand over his hand, up his arm and across his shoulders and leans in to kiss his cheek as they stop at a red light.

Katniss settles back in her seat and hopes when this all inevitably ends that he’ll remember moments like these. That he’ll close those beautiful blue eyes of his and picture her like this, wearing a dark orange sundress, resting her bare feet on the dashboard and singing along with the radio. She knows she’ll never be able to forget the nights in her apartment that even her roommate doesn’t know about. Her memories will live on as sighs escaping parted lips, names being whispered in the dark, hands tangling in hair and clothes falling to her floor.

Even if she never sees him again after this summer, she’ll close her eyes and picture him, strong arms and sun-kissed skin with a smile on his lips. She can only hope that when the time comes, he will do the same.

\---

_He said let's get out of this town, drive out of the city, away from the crowds. I thought heaven can't help me now, nothing lasts forever but this is gonna take me down. He's so tall, and handsome as hell. He's so bad but he does it so well. I can see the end as it begins, my one condition is…_

_Say you'll remember me, standing in a nice dress, staring at the sunset, babe. Red lips and rosy cheeks, say you'll see me again even if it's just in your wildest dreams…_

_I said "No one has to know what we do.” His hands are in my hair, his clothes are in my room and his voice is a familiar sound. Nothing lasts forever, but this is getting good now._

_You see me in hindsight, tangled up with you all night, burnin' it down. Some day when you leave me, I bet these memories follow you around._


	10. How You Get the Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Work hard and it may pay off.

Katniss opens her door and shrieks after seeing a person on her couch. For most people in college, this wouldn’t be a big deal, but Katniss lives alone. Seeing a human is not something that occurs often after she leaves campus.

Luckily, it takes all of two seconds for her to realize that the man in her living room is not an unintelligent thief who paused for a break. It’s the guy she dated the previous semester.

She thinks she would have preferred the thief.

She puts her stuff down on the entryway table and takes her coat off before turning to the man in the next room.

“This is what I get for dating a guy who lives in my building. I take it I forgot to lock up this morning?”

She sees the man nod. “I promise I wasn’t trying to be creepy. I knocked a few times and the door actually opened a little bit on its own. I’ve only been here for a few minutes. Just figured you wouldn’t let me in if I was on the other side of the door.”

“Peeta, we didn’t have a crazy, scary break up. I wouldn’t have thrown things at you.”

“I know you have killer aim. I didn’t want to chance it.”

Katniss laughs despite herself and sits down next to him on the couch. “So why are you here, Peeta? I haven’t heard from you or seen you since last semester.”

Peeta shifts nervously on the couch. “I actually came to talk to you about that. I owe you about eighteen apologies.”

“That’s a very exact number.”

“I’m rounding down. I’m sure it’s more.”

Katniss shrugs in acceptance. “You’re not wrong.”

“Is it okay if I try to explain?” She nods and he takes a deep breath to continue. “So, I know you teased me about always talking and having something to say but you scare the hell out of me. I’ve had a thing for you since freshman year and the fact that I finally got you to go out with me last spring was huge for me. I had intended on staying in town for the summer and just work somewhere random here, kind of similar to what you planned on doing...or did?” Peeta asks, realizing he doesn’t know if she followed through and stayed nearby. At her agreeing nod, he picks back up. “But my dad got really sick. We had only gone on like five dates and hadn’t had any real conversations so I didn’t feel okay with the idea of explaining why I was going to be gone for probably the entire summer and still wanting to ask you to wait for me until I got back.”

Katniss takes advantage of his pause and puts a hand on his arm. “I wish you had told me.”

“I wish I had too. But I meant what I said. You scared the hell out of me. I didn’t feel like I could do that.”

“I figured you changed your mind,” Katniss admits, looking down at her lap.

Peeta shakes his head quickly. “Not at all.” The confidence Katniss always identified with him previously seems to come back to him as he shifts to sit closer to her. He takes her hands in his. “How could I change my mind? I seem to remember some pretty incredible nights.”

She feels her face flush. “I’m sorry. Not sure what you could possibly be talking about.”

“Need me to refresh your memory?” His voice gets lower and softer. He sees Katniss swallow and shake her head. “You sure? I remember having a lot of fun after we went to that little Italian place. And that other time, the one when we actually missed our reservation…”

He trails off and kisses Katniss’ cheek. He can almost feel her pulse thudding under her skin where his hands still hold hers. She turns her face towards his. “Is this how you’re getting me to give you a second chance?”

“Depends. Is it working?” His voice is almost a whisper at this point.

“Maybe. I may need more help remembering.”

Peeta takes it as an invitation to move in, catching her lips with his. He lets his body weight push her to a lying position on the couch so he can move over her. Her hands wind around his back and grasp at the back of his shirt as their kiss deepens. They become a bit more intertwined and continue kissing, only occasionally breaking apart for air when desperately needed.

After what feels like hours caught up in one another, Peeta pulls back. “Remember now?”

She smiles softly. “Remembering enough to give you another chance to prove you didn’t change your mind.”

Peeta looks down at the girl beneath him. “How the hell could I ever not want this?”

\---

_Say it's been a long six months and you were too afraid to tell her what you want. And that's how it works. It's how you get the girl. And then you say…_

_I want you for worse or for better; I would wait for ever and ever. Broke your heart, I'll put it back together. I would wait for ever and ever._

_Remind her how it used to be, be….with pictures in frames, of kisses on cheeks, cheeks. Tell her how you must've lost your mind when you left her all alone and never told her why. And that's how it works._

 

 


	11. This Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Patience is a virtue, sometimes learned in the hardest of ways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry! This would have been up earlier but I got locked out of my apartment and had to sit out in the cold for about two hours. This was my first order of business after finally getting to eat dinner though. Hope you enjoy.

How long had it been?

A year? A year and a half?

Everything seems faded, like an old photograph left in the sun for too long.

Gale stirs in bed next to her and causes her new reality to slap her in the face as she returns to the present and stops reminiscing of things that can never be again. The man next to her has much darker features than the one she had been dreaming of and lacks the easy going nature of the boy she still loves.

Gale knows. He is careful not to mention the boy from her past, having seen her response whenever the name is mentioned. She, the girl known for never showing her emotion, tears up just at the thought of the boy whose love she had known and lost. And Gale never finds it in himself to complain.

There was no breakup, no fight, no cheating that had ended things. Only vindictive hatred that caused an irrevocable damage to the love story of Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark.

She can still hear his father’s voice in her ear, saying words she never thought she’d have to hear.

_ There’s been an accident. _

She remembers running into the hospital room, seeing the boy she loves immobile and missing part of his leg.

And somehow, his mother, the cause of the accident, had come out without more than a few scratches.

She remembers hearing Brandon Mellark shouting at his wife in the waiting room. Words like “how could you let this happen?” and “eyewitnesses heard you shouting at him” and “are you happy now?”

Brandon Mellark later admitted to her that apparently Peeta’s mother had been yelling at him to end, what she considered, to be a farce of a relationship. She had never liked Katniss. Had never pretended to.

And because she couldn’t keep her mouth shut and just pay attention to the road, Peeta had spent the past year (year and a half? Katniss had lost track of days so long ago) in a coma.

Doctors had been urging Brandon to pull the plug for six months (seven?) now, but the grieving father just couldn’t bring himself to do it. Peeta had been showing slight hints of improvement every month and giving up on his sons was something Brandon Mellark just didn’t do.

Katniss gives up on sleep and smiles sadly at Gale. She knows she is only using him for comfort. It had been easy to fall into the arms of someone she trusts. It had been easy to spend time with him.

However, as long as there was still hope, Katniss knows she will never move forward with Gale. They spend time together, they kiss and he sleeps at her apartment on occasion, but it never goes further. Katniss can’t let it.

Not while there is still a chance Peeta may come back.

She looks at the clock on her bedside table and sighs. Only three in the morning. Sleep always comes so sparingly on Friday nights.

Saturdays are when she goes to visit Peeta.

Sleeping is never an option. Especially not tonight. Not after the nightmares.

They are always the same. She sees the accident happening from afar and is unable to do anything as Peeta’s lifeless body is pulled from the wreckage of the car. The nightmares are more frequent later in the week as it gets closer to when she is going to see him. Tonight is no exception.

Katniss sighs and rolls over, reaching for her phone and pulls up her Kindle app, hoping that a novel will help pass the time until she can get ready to see him.

Seventeen chapters of _Pride and Prejudice_ later, Katniss finally gets up and begins her normal routine, both looking forward to and dreading her upcoming time at the hospital. She calls a goodbye to Gale as she leaves, with the only response being a grunt.

After arriving at the hospital, Katniss walks the well-known path to Peeta’s room. She meets with the nurse who has been doing the majority of his paperwork and finds that there has been some signs of improvement even over the past week. She tries not to let that information make her too hopeful and she goes to sit by Peeta’s bedside.

“Hey Peeta,” she says, running her fingers through his blond curls. “I know you aren’t gonna wake up until you’re well enough to, but if you can, can you get better soon? Life out here sucks pretty badly without you and it just isn’t fair that you get to nap through it all while the rest of us flounder. Gale says hello, by the way. I told you last week how I was worried I was leading him on when I’m still yours but we talked and he gets it. He knows that he is basically just keeping me company while I wait for you. I’ve been pretty lonely.” Katniss lays her head on the mattress next to Peeta’s hand. Her voice is muffled as she continues.

“Peeta, I still love you so much. Whenever you want to come back…I hope you’ll still love me.” She stops, trying to stop the tears from coming.

She’s still trying to regain her breath when she feels fingers move through her hair and hears a voice she hasn’t heard in over a year.

“Always.”

\---

_ Tossing, turning, struggled through the night with someone new and I could go on and on, on and on. Lantern burning, flickered in my mind for only you but you're still gone, gone, gone. _

_Been losing grip, oh, sinking ships. You showed up just in time_

_ This love is good, this love is bad. This love is alive back from the dead. These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me. _

_When you're young you just run, but you come back to what you need._

 

 


	12. I Know Places

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Canon AU: Post Mockingjay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry - this was supposed to go up last night but I was away from my computer all evening, went to see Gone Girl late at night and then just stared shell-shocked at a wall for a while. So to make up for it, this chapter and the next one ("Clean") will be up tonight before I go to bed and then there are only three more, so the last one should be up on New Year's Eve.

Peeta looks around and realizes the crowd of people they thought they had lost themselves in are actually all staring at them. “Katniss?”

His girlfriend is paying no attention and has spent the entire walk keeping her eyes on the ground in front of them, occasionally glancing at a store window or two. She has been spacing out frequently since they arrived in the Capitol and he can’t much blame her. Every corner seems to have something memorializing the two of them, the rebellion or fallen friends they’ve lost.

Finally, Katniss’s gaze is drawn to Peeta. “Why did we agree to do this?”

He smiles sadly as he reaches for her hand. “Because they’ve left us alone for five years and have shockingly not asked for a thing.”

“You’re right. Paylor promised we won’t have to give speeches right?”

Peeta nods. “Just attend a banquet and a handful of meetings so we know where the country is standing now. This seems to be solely for our benefits.”

Katniss rolls her eyes. “Yeah, ours and the media’s. Don’t try to tell me you haven’t seen the photographers everywhere we’ve gone.”

“Oh I have,” Peeta says, gripping her hand just a little tighter. “They make me kinda nervous, to be honest. I know how photogs like to spin something. I’m trusting no one without a signed note from Cressida saying they aren’t awful.”

“Right there with you.” Katniss notices Peeta’s face paling by the second and quickly checks their surroundings. “I have a plan. Will you follow along, no questions asked?”

Peeta stops walking and just stares blankly at her. “Don’t I always?”

“True. Okay, put your arm around me and kiss me.”

“Kiss you-”

“Peeta…”

He leans down and kisses her on the cheek, leaning in as if he is going to whisper something in her ear and then lifts her chin with his index finger. He kisses her lips and snakes an arm around her waist. Katniss smiles and allows her eyes to roam over his features before breaking away with a rather impressive - but still fake sounding to Peeta - laugh and then grabs his hand to drag him into a small cafe.

“What was that?”

“Hold on. Plan’s not over yet,” Katniss says, still pulling him through the restaurant. As one of the workers moves to stop them, she shoots him a pleading glance and he stops and instead just points to a door and nods. “Thank you,” she says gratefully.

The door leads them to an alley and she takes him to the back entrance of another restaurant. This one is almost entirely empty except for a handful of people towards the front of the room, but Katniss leads Peeta to a back booth where they are hidden by the tall seats.

A waiter appears almost instantly and brings them waters, letting them know he’d be back soon to take orders. Peeta stares at Katniss, utterly baffled.

“I may have made a few calls. I figured the media would realize quickly we were here and I sweet-talked Paylor into having a few places agree to hide us when we needed a breath or two. I realized we were close to one when we were on that street corner, so...here we are. We distracted the camera idiots and now we get to eat in peace.”

“I’m not gonna lie; I’m pretty impressed.”

“By what exactly? The plan or my ability to keep it secret?”

Peeta smiles. “Both. And by you actually coming out here with me.”

“When they agreed to not force Panem’s golden-tongued boy into giving a speech, I figured they must be desperate.”

“You’re not wrong. The world thinks you started a rebellion and I was all over the place, on both sides. They would probably be thrilled having the most random, inane photos of our everyday life.”

“Which is why we are hidden in the back of a restaurant.” Peeta can’t help but smile at Katniss as she eagerly peruses the menu.

“Look at you, still keeping me safe.”

“Well, I don’t have my bow and arrow, so I figured this will have to do.”

\---

_ You stand with your hand on my waist line. It's a scene and we're out here in plain sight. I can hear them whisper as we pass by; it's a bad sign, bad sign. Something happens when everybody finds out; see the vultures circling dark clouds. _

_ Baby, I know places we won't be found and they'll be chasing their tails tryin' to track us down, cause I, I know places we can hide. _

_ Just grab my hand and don't ever drop it, my love. They are the hunters, we are the foxes and we run. _

_ They take their shots, but we're bulletproof and you know for me, it's always you. In the dead of night, your eyes so green, and I know for you, it's always me. _

__


	13. Clean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Getting rid of the past never truly erases it, but it helps you move on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, here is the second chapter for the day! Only three more after this one.

“Katniss?”

Peeta’s voice echoes through the apartment as he cautiously peers around corners in search of his best friend. The silence worries him almost as much as his unanswered text messages from the past two days. While occasionally needing space, it was rare to be blatantly ignored.

“Katniss?”

Her bedroom is empty but Peeta notices her bathroom light shining through the cracked door. He gasps when he opens it and finds Katniss sitting in the floor of her shower, curled up on herself and shaking. “Katniss?”

She turns to him and he isn’t sure if there are tears on her face or merely spray from the shower. Suddenly, he seems to wake up and moves to get one of the oversized towels he knows she keeps in her linen closet. He quickly turns off the water and wraps the towel around her body without a second thought, lifting her as easily as if she were a child. He sets her down on her bed and sits next to her. He tries to gauge what had occurred as he chafes his hands over her towel-covered arms in order to warm her up.

After a few long, silent moments, Katniss finally speaks up. “Thank you, Peeta.”

He looks her in the eyes. “What happened?”

Her voice is sturdier after she takes a breath. “I did it,” she says. “I finally got rid of his things.”

“Oh, Katniss. I’m so proud of you.”

It had been three months since Katniss’ boyfriend of seven years had up and left, claiming that since Katniss never wanted to get married and have children, there was no reason for him to stay and that he had already done his time.

Needless to say, it broke Katniss, the girl who valued stability and comfort more than anything else in the world.

The past three months had been shaky, to say the least, with Peeta constantly showing up with food and random treats in hopes of making sure she was eating and taking care of herself. She hadn’t had an obvious backslide in weeks, until now.

Katniss buries her head in Peeta’s chest and he can feel her breathing calm down. “It was just hard, you know? Seven years meant he had a lot of stuff here. We had a history through some of the things he left behind.”

“Obviously, you’re upset, but other than being shaken up, are you okay?” His arm goes around her back to pull her further into him.

“I think so. I mean, it was tough, but getting rid of his things felt like throwing off that last hold he had on me. I can start over, now. He’s finally gone, you know?”

Peeta nods against the crown of her head. “Yeah. Yeah, I get it.” He finds himself internally cursing the man who had brought his beautiful, strong friend to her knees. “I really am proud of you, you know?”

Katniss pulls away from him slightly and smiles faintly. “I know you are. I’m kind of proud of me too. And I’m glad you didn’t let me try to get him to come back.”

“I think we both know I can’t stop you from doing anything,” Peeta says with a laugh. “I just helped you realize it wasn’t a good idea.”

“I needed this, though. I just couldn’t shake him. It was like I needed to purge my apartment of him to finally have him completely out of my life. I’m not trying to pretend it happened, but how are you supposed to move on when memories are staring you in the face?”

Peeta kisses the top of her head. “I think you are allowed more than three months to move on from a seven-year relationship. You need to give yourself some credit.”

“Yeah, but I’m only twenty-five. I was with him from the first day of college, practically. I need to be resilient. I need to bounce back.”

“Silly, stubborn girl,” Peeta says affectionately. “You show one moment of weakness and suddenly are determined to be overzealous in your return to real life.”

“Watch out; I’ll be dating again soon,” she teases.

“Give yourself at least six months, for the love of all that is holy. I don’t want to have to worry about who you’d rebound with.”

“Nah, I figured I’d try to avoid that rebound crap. Nothing good comes of it.” She can feel Peeta’s nod against her and takes a breath. “I figured I’d wait till I was good and ready before I asked this guy on a date.”

Peeta tenses. “Oh, you’ve already got your sights on someone?”

“Yep,” she says. “He’s pretty fantastic but the last thing I want to do is move to quickly and potentially ruin things with him.”

“Oh. That’s...great.”

Katniss senses the strain in his voice and decides to put him out of his misery.”So if I wait the six months and decide I’m ready, you’d say yes?”

Peeta breathes out a relieved laugh. “Of course, Katniss. You know I would. Just take your time. I’ll gladly wait.”

Katniss curls back up into him, feeling content and safe. _Three more months_.

\---

_ The drought was the very worst, when the flowers that we'd grown together died of thirst. It was months, and months of back and forth. You're still all over me like I wine-stained dress I can't wear anymore. Hung my head, as I lost the war, and the sky turn black like a perfect storm. _

_Rain came pouring down when I was drowning, that's when I could finally breathe. And that morning, gone was any trace of you, I think I am finally clean._


	14. Wonderland

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Canon Compliant(ish): A pep talk from a Mellark goes a long way.

“What do you mean it was all an act?”

Peeta shakes his head, frustrated. “I don’t know what to tell you,” he says. “That’s just all I know.”

Rye follows his younger brother as he walks to the backyard, still with an incredulous look on his face. “How do you not ask questions? You’ve been in love with the girl for god-knows-how-long and suddenly you just accept that everything was a lie?”

“Katniss helped save my life. I think it’s best we just be grateful for that. Without her, I wouldn’t be here today.” Peeta sits on the steps of his back porch and shrugs helplessly. “In her eyes, we’re just even. She saved my life and I saved hers when we were younger. I can’t expect her to explain everything that happened in the Games. You don’t know what it’s like in there.”

“No, I don’t,” Rye admits. “But I still find it hard to believe she doesn’t feel anything for you. Those were some pretty serious kisses, little bro.”

Peeta rolls his eyes and even lets a smile slip through. “That part was fun, I’ll admit. But it was all for the Games. I was wrapped up in it because it was the girl I loved. She was always thinking ahead though. She knew that was the only way I’d be able to get what I needed. I’m not entirely uncertain she wouldn’t have died for me in there.”

“And that isn’t love to you?”

“It’s repaying a debt.”

“I highly doubt that.” Rye leans over and nudges Peeta’s shoulder with his. “And I’m not sure you believe all you’re saying either.”

“It’s the simplest thing. I can’t let myself hope. It’s easier just to remember that everyone goes a bit mad in the Games. I partnered with people I despised just to save Katniss. She had to kill someone. You become someone who isn’t yourself.”

“Peeta, they didn’t change you. Not really,” his brother says consolingly. “You still seem to be the same boy I’ve grown up with. Still painting, still baking, still mooning over Katniss Everdeen.”

“Not sure I’m doing anything over her anymore, honestly.” Peeta’s voice trails off and for the first time, Rye realizes that the Games did more to his brother than he had ever realized. He was still the sweet, calm and rational guy that everyone in the district seemed to know and love. But he was no longer open; he was jaded, far more jaded than any sixteen-year-old should have to be.

“I get it. I promise I’ll try to stop screwing with you. I know Mom is being kinda ridiculous about us not moving out here with you, but you’ll come around some right?”

“Yeah, Rye. I’ll come around.” The voice is still quiet, distant, throwing doubt into the older boy’s mind. He has a suspicion that it will be a long time before Peeta makes any move to see his family.

Rye gets up and ruffles his brother’s hair. “I have to get back to the bakery. My shift starts soon. See you later, Peet. Love you.”

He finally gets a small smile out of Peeta with his last sentence. “Love you too, bro. See ya.”

As Rye heads away from Peeta’s house, he finds himself making a detour rather than just heading straight for the bakery. He doesn’t quite understand what he’s doing, even as he walks up the stairs to the Everdeen house and knocks heavily on the door.

He’s shocked to find himself face-to-face with Katniss when the door opens. “Rye? Why are you here?” Katniss’s face goes from confusion to terror. “Is Peeta okay?”

Rye reaches out and grabs her arms. “Peeta’s fine. Honest. Just came to talk to you.”

Suspicion clouds her face. “You want to talk to me?” Rye nods. “Okay. Can we sit out here? It feels weird talking at all inside that house. It’s too...Capitol.” Rye nods again and the two sit on the porch swing facing one another. “So…?”

“What the hell is going on with you and my brother?” he blurts out.

Katniss looks astonished at the outburst. “Excuse me-”

“No, sorry, can I explain?” Katniss shrugs her assent, some anger and confusion still evident in her expression. “You seem to care about him.”

“I do.”

“Then why is he under the impression that any feelings you may have towards him were a lie?”

Katniss opens her mouth to respond, but instead pauses and just looks at him. “Because I don’t know what was real and what was done just to save him. It isn’t fair to let him believe more ‘til I know myself.”

Rye smiles sadly. “Katniss, you risked your life to save his. I think you know better than you may think. It’s okay. Just because you had to start out as ‘star-crossed lovers’ doesn’t mean you can’t actually take it slow now. People won’t be watching you here. Take it a step at a time.” He rests his hand on hers briefly and gets up, this time intent on getting to the bakery.

“Rye?” Katniss’s voice cuts into the air as he walks down the stairs. He turns. “ You’re right.”

\---

_So we went on our way, too in love to think straight, all alone or so it seemed. But there were strangers watching, and whispers turned to talking, and talking turned to screams._

_ Didn't they tell us don't rush into things? Didn't you flash your green eyes at me? Didn't you calm my fears with a Cheshire Cat smile? Didn't it all seem new and exciting? I felt your arms twisting around me. It's all fun and games 'til somebody loses their mind. _

 

 


	15. You Are in Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Modern AU: Take the leap. Trust me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second to last one...so have some fluff.

Katniss had known for a long time that it would take a lot for her boyfriend to fall in love.

She can’t blame him; she’s the same way. They have similar scars from abuse, one emotional and one physical, that all but forbids them to fall so much into another person that they could ever be hurt like that again.

Lately, Katniss is finding it hard to stick to her rules about never falling in love. With every day, she trusts Peeta more and even trusts herself to not do what her mother did. She knows she would fall to pieces without Peeta and refuses to even think of a life without him. But she also realizes that, whether he’ll admit it or not, he is feeling the same. She doesn’t have to wonder what it would be like to not have him. And if worst came to worst, she knows she has the strength her mother never did to pick herself back up.

Sitting in her favorite squishy chair in her boyfriend’s living room, she fingers the hem of the button-up shirt she had stolen from him to wear while he’s at work. She glances out the window before turning back to the mystery novel laying in her lap. The rain keeps up a steady rhythm against the side of the house and she remembers making Peeta promise to drive extra carefully on his way to work since she suspected the rain would turn to sleet.

She also remembers his promise to bring home some cheese buns for her when he closes up shop for the day.

Her stomach grumbles at the mere thought and she smiles, grateful that his Sunday shifts end much closer to lunchtime than dinner.

Sure enough, after only another hour of reading her book, the door opens and she hears his heavy footfalls without even having to glance at the entryway. She soon feels him press a kiss to the top of her head and a white paper sack falls on top of her book and she can almost feel the warmth through the pages on her lap.

“You remembered!” She beams up at him. “Thank you,” she says, reaching up to pull him down for a quick kiss.

He grins back down at her before walking towards the kitchen, presumably to make the rest of their lunch. “Of course. You know I never break my promises.”

The sentence warms her almost as much as the bag on her legs. She inhales quickly and decides to follow her gut and use some of her reserve strength. “Peeta?”

He turns to her with the smile still on his face. “Yeah, babe?”

“I love you.”

If she hadn’t been so nervous, Katniss would have laughed at the shock on his face.

“Don’t worry,” she rushes to say. “I don’t expect you to say it back. It’s just true. You never break your promises and I trust you enough to believe them. And I am always just so happy to be around you. I just kinda figured that’s what love is, so I wanted you to know how I felt. Cuz...yeah…” She drifts off awkwardly as her short-lived bravado fades quickly.

Peeta’s smile returns and he walks quickly over to her, pulling her out of the chair, and she can hear him stifle a groan as he realizes that his shirt is the only thing really covering her. He quickly stops that train of thought before whisking her off her feet in a huge hug. He sets her back down and showers her face with light kisses. After a moment, he pulls back. “I never want to give you a reason for regretting saying that. You know you mean the world to me, and I can’t imagine a world without you.”

Katniss smiles up at him, grateful that he has responded positively. “I know. And I don’t think I’ll ever regret feeling this way.”

Peeta picks her up, throwing her over his shoulder as if she were one of the sacks of flour he frequently lifts at the bakery. “Now you are going to see how much I love you wearing my shirts,” he says over her giggles as he takes her to the bedroom.

\---

“Katniss. Psst. Katniss.”

Peeta’s urgent whisper wakes her up later that night and she sits straight up, convinced the house is on fire or someone is dying. “Peeta?” She turns and stares at him, baffled. She notices that he looks as though he had recently had a mental breakthrough. “Is everything okay?”

“You’re my best friend. And my girlfriend.”

The direction of the conversation is enough to cause her to shake her head as though to clear the confusion away. “Yes…” she says, a questioning lilt to her voice.

“You love me.”

“Correct again.”

“The way you defined it earlier is the same as how I feel about you,” Peeta says. “Oh god, you know I feel that way about you, right?”

Katniss can’t help but laugh. “Yeah, I had a suspicion.”

He turns his eyes towards her and his slightly befuddled look turns into elation. “I think that means I love you too.”

Katniss leans in and kisses him. “Yeah, Peeta. I think it does.”

\---

_Morning, his place, burnt toast, Sunday. You keep his shirt; he keeps his word. And for once you let go of your fears and your ghosts. One step, not much, but it said enough. You kissed on sidewalks; you fight and you talk. One night he wakes, strange look on his face, pauses, then says, you're my best friend, and you knew what it was, he is in love._

_Cause you can hear in the silence. You can feel it on the way home. You can see it with the lights out. You're in love, true love_

 


	16. New Romantics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Canon Compliant: A view into the Capital.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here's the final one. Thanks for reading!

He tears at his restraints yet again and a tired sigh escapes the Peacekeeper standing over him.

“Mr. Mellark, the more you cooperate, the easier this will be.”

Peeta merely lets out an almost inhuman growl in response and the Peacekeeper looks nervously at his partner.

“How far did the President say we have to take this?” his partner asks.

The two step away from the groaning blonde boy strapped to his chair and confer in the corner out of earshot.

“Snow said we need to break him. He didn’t care what all it took, as long as any injuries he had would either be covered by clothing or easily disguised with makeup. Luckily, the hijacking doesn’t leave too many physical scarring,” says the first.

His second-in-command looks back over to the Victor. “Are we sure this won’t kill him? He barely seems like a shell of himself. I don’t think he knows anything, honestly.”

The other Peacekeeper slaps him on the arm. “You don’t say that shit in here,” he says, his voice a barely audible hiss. “Just because you don’t agree with it doesn’t mean you can question it. Orders from the President don’t come with asterisks or amendments. This is what we’re told to do and we do it.”

“Okay, I get that.” His reply was low and quick. “But do you have any idea what we’re supposed to get out of him?”

“Katniss Everdeen. However we can.”

\---

In the early days of the hijacking, Peeta’s thoughts would go back and forth, tossing and turning as much as he did at night trying to get moderately comfortable on the stone floor of his cell. Memories would flash in and out like a broadcast from the Capital showing up on the screens of District 12 and pushing through the normal static.

He spends his days being injected with needles and being informed that the girl that he loves is nothing more than a traitor.

They ask him to give up information, to tell them what he knows about District 13 and the Rebellion.  

They ask him if he knows where Katniss is.

He isn’t sure what he’s more grateful for when it comes to that question, the fact that they don’t know where she is or that they assume she is alive. Peeta vaguely remembers seeing the forcefield slowly fall to pieces and then all he remembers are the screams of the last few tributes and the sounds of the hovercrafts descending upon the arena.

He can’t say he doesn’t wish he was with her, wherever she is. Surely she is in District 13 (Peeta didn’t understand how there is a District 13, but he can’t bring himself to care at this point if it means she is safe) and away from this hell that has become the Capital.

This hell is filled with needles, Joanna’s screams and Peacekeepers.

But at night, at least he assumes it is night, they leave him alone. They let him curl up in a ball and be left alone with his thoughts. They allow him to war with himself, trying to work out which memories are real and which are imagined.

He is beginning to question a lot of his memories with Katniss. He’s even starting to wonder if she really did have something to do with the rebellion. He is no longer certain of everything.

At least during the day.

Because at night, when his mind is allowed to rest, he dreams of her. He sees their past, and none of the memories are shiny. They are clearer than anything else he has in his head.

He can see her, as a child, innocently singing and having no idea she had just captured the heart of a blonde boy watching from the corner of the room. He can see her, as a tribute yet to go to the Arena, covered in a gown that spins and goes up in flames. He can see her, as a Victor sent back to die, kissing him on the beach and showing no signs of acting.

They twist and torture him every single day, warping his conscious mind into putty and filling it with new memories that don’t fit with the dreams he has of Katniss every night. He begins to shout out that she is evil, that she is the reason for all this destruction, but he only agrees with these statements during his waking hours.

Peeta’s now the Capital’s weapon, with Snow safe at the knowledge that he will actively tear the girl he once claimed to love limb from limb if he ever sees her again.

They have no way of knowing that at night, the memories reshape in the form of dreams and keep that little voice whispering in the back of his mind, making him question what is real or not real every day.

They will never be able to stop him from whispering her name in his sleep. They may have made him a piece in their games, but that, that small reminder of her and hope. That they can never take from him.

\---

_ 'Cause, baby, I could build a castle out of all the bricks they threw at me, and every day is like a battle but every night with us is like a dream _

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to say thank you so much to everyone who has taken the time to read, follow, comment or subscribe/kudo this story. It means the world to me and the response has made my month fantastic.

**Author's Note:**

> Hoping to have a drabble posted every day/evening. Hope you all enjoy!
> 
> Feel free to leave feedback, here or on tumblr (oywiththepeetaalready). Come say hi. I'm friendly; I promise.


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